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But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It's no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.
Bill Hicks
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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Food
Missed
Wonderful
Ass
Wrong
Meeting
Come
Meetings
Miracle
Turd
Sex
Turds
Eating
Veneration
Coming
Childbirth
More quotes by Bill Hicks
I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.
Bill Hicks
I used to love to call L.A. when I lived in New York... Is that the Big One I hear in the background? Bye, you lizard scum! Bye!
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The Voice of Reason is in us all...and everyone can recognize it because it makes sense and everyone benefits from it equally.
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Laughter makes the bitter swallowing of truth, for some, a little easier.
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You're not a human till you're in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
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People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?'
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I saw a sign on the side of the road in Tennessee once that said 'dirt for sale'... what a great country we live in. DIRT for sale. How would you like to get inside that guy's mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn't he?
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It's my object to be stared at like a dog that's just been shown a card trick.
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Pot is a better drug than alcohol. I'll prove it to you. You're at a ball game or a concert, and someone's really violent and agressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or are they smoking pot?
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We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
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I'm just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth.
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We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
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Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children.
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This is the idea that has made me...an anonymous figure in America...If you have children here tonight...they are NOT special.
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Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! ... That's the story of Jesus.
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It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.
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I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.
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Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.
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Sometimes you feel in control, and it's great, but sometimes you just don't feel in control and you really have to struggle to get laughs.
Bill Hicks