Quote

But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It's no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Wonderful
Ass
Wrong
Meeting
Come
Meetings
Miracle
Turd
Sex
Turds
Eating
Veneration
Coming
Childbirth
Food
Missed

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We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
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Go back to bed America, your government is in control again. Go back to bed America... you are free to do as we tell you... you are free to do as we tell you.
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I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine! Let's go over those numbers again, they're a little baffling at first: Iraq: 150,000, USA: 79. Does that mean we could have won with only 80 guys there? Just one guy in a ticker-tape parade, I did it! Hey!
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I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.
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Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the Weather.
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I saw a sign on the side of the road in Tennessee once that said 'dirt for sale'... what a great country we live in. DIRT for sale. How would you like to get inside that guy's mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn't he?
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I hate patriotism... I can't stand it. It's a round world last time I checked.
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Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
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I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f-kin' mouth.
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I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself - to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.
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We killed 6 innocent people, launching 22, I think $3 million apiece missiles on Baghdad...that's a little bit overdoing it.
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What does an atheist scream when they come?
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No one can give you any answers. There aren't any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
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We are losing the 'War on Drugs,' which means there's a war going on and people on drugs are winning it.
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Pornography is any act that has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts...Sounds like almost every commercial on TV to me.
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It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.
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Music is a great energizer. It's a language everybody knows.
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Will there be titty? Sure. Boom! I'm a producer. Where you been all our life, boy? We been lookin for you in Hollywood.
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Mister, I don't want no trouble. I just came downtown here to get some hard rock candy for my kids, some gingham for my wife. I don't even know what gingham is, but she goes through about ten rolls a week of that stuff. I ain't looking for no trouble, Mister.
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Why is pot against the law? It wouldn't be because anyone can grow it, and therefore you can't make a profit off it, would it?
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