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Smoking may cause fetal injury or premature birth. ... I found my brand. Just don't get the ones that say, Lung Cancer.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Birth
Premature
Cause
Lungs
Ones
Warning
Causes
Brand
Found
Injury
May
Brands
Smoking
Fetal
Cancer
Lung

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I'm an American who loves an America which doesn't exist, which is a land of freedom and free ideas.
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I just have one of those faces. People come up to me and say, 'What's wrong?' Nothing. 'Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile.' Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me alone?
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I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine! Let's go over those numbers again, they're a little baffling at first: Iraq: 150,000, USA: 79. Does that mean we could have won with only 80 guys there? Just one guy in a ticker-tape parade, I did it! Hey!
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All governments are lying cocksuckers.
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas.
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You ever notice that everyone who believes in creationism looks really un-evolved?
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We are losing the 'War on Drugs,' which means there's a war going on and people on drugs are winning it.
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let's put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
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I wish I could meet a Christian who would proselytize to me, but they keep running away from me. I wanna talk to you all.
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
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What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
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This is where we are at right now, as a whole. No one is left out of the loop. We are experiencing a reality based on a thin veneer of lies and illusions. A world where greed is our God and wisdom is sin, where division is key and unity is fantasy, where the ego-driven cleverness of the mind is praised, rather than the intelligence of the heart.
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I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.
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I find it ironic that people who are against things that cause sexual thoughts are generally fundamentalist Christians who also believe you should be fruitful and multiply.
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The waitress comes over to me like, 'What'chu readin' for?' I had never been asked that. Not 'What am I reading?' but 'What am I reading for?' Goddammit, you stumped me. Hmm, why do I read? I suppose I read for a lot of reasons, one of the main ones being so I don't end up being a... waffle waitress.
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I've had good times on drugs...bad times on drugs...But I've had good and bad relationships...and I'm not giving up pussy.
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Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
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