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Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Thing
Jerks
Chicks
Jerk
Sure

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.
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They Want You To Be A Docile Apathetic Consumer
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I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.
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All your beliefs, they're just that. They're nothing. They're how you were taught and raised. That doesn't make 'em real.
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Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the Weather.
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Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that's why you giggle the first hour.
Bill Hicks
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I was just down in Dallas, Texas...the Assassination Museum...it's really accurate, you know, 'cause Oswald's not in it.
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The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It's a war against our civil rights, that's all it is. They're using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
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To me pornography is...spending all your money and not educating the people in America, but spending it instead on weapons.
Bill Hicks
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Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.
Bill Hicks
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Folks, it's time to evolve. That's why we're troubled. You know why our institutions are failing us, the church, the state, everything's failing? It's because, um - they're no longer relevant. We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
Bill Hicks
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That's why I always recommend a psychedelic experience because it makes you realize that all you've learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily the truth.
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What before seemed a...frustrating wall, the comic deftly and fearlessly steps through, proving the absurdity of it all.
Bill Hicks
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Sometimes you feel in control, and it's great, but sometimes you just don't feel in control and you really have to struggle to get laughs.
Bill Hicks
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Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas.
Bill Hicks
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
Bill Hicks
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I was always 'awake'...Some part of me clamoring for NEW insights and NEW ways to make the world a better place.
Bill Hicks
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Are gun rights advocates arguing that roving gangs...shooting innocent bystanders constitutes a 'well-regulated militia'?
Bill Hicks
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We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
Bill Hicks
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When you're...stepping over a guy on the sidewalk...does it ever occur to you to think, 'Wow. Maybe our system doesn't work?'
Bill Hicks