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All governments are lying cocksuckers.
Bill Hicks
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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Governments
Lying
Government
More quotes by Bill Hicks
I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That's faith in action folks! You know he's got God on his side.
Bill Hicks
How about a positive LSD story? Wouldn't that be news-worthy, just the once? To base your decision on information rather than scare tactics and superstition and lies? I think it would be news-worthy.
Bill Hicks
It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.
Bill Hicks
I don't identify with anyone historically, but there are several people in the future who I am a dead ringer for.
Bill Hicks
The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
Bill Hicks
Courtroom for Ted Bundy's trial is packed with women, trying to meet him and give him love letters and wedding-fucking-proposals...and the first thought that enters my mind is, And I'm not getting laid. What am I doing wrong?
Bill Hicks
We'll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God - I am killing me!
Bill Hicks
You're not a human till you're in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
Bill Hicks
When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
Bill Hicks
If I thought the Jews killed God, I'd worship the Jews.
Bill Hicks
That's why I always recommend a psychedelic experience because it makes you realize that all you've learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily the truth.
Bill Hicks
[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is...thinking, 'This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.'
Bill Hicks
We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
Bill Hicks
While I've found many of the religious shows I've viewed over the years not to be to my liking, or in line with my own beliefs, I've never considered it my place to exert any greater type of censorship than changing the channel, or better yet - turning off the TV completely.
Bill Hicks
People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?'
Bill Hicks
Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. I believe God created me in one day. Yeah, looks like he rushed it.
Bill Hicks
What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn't it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It's gonna be worth it!.
Bill Hicks
The CIA has a plot...they've used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem...is convincing Hussein...to fly to Dallas.
Bill Hicks
It's you people dying from nothing that are screwed. I got all sorts of neat gadgets waiting for me...oxygen tent, iron lung.
Bill Hicks
Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both sexes I don't listen to.
Bill Hicks