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People are bringing SHOTGUNS to UFO sightings...brings a whole new meaning to that phrase 'You ain't from around here, ar'ya?'

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Phrases
Bringing
Brings
Meaning
Around
Sightings
Whole
Shotguns
People
Ufo
Phrase

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I'm an American who loves an America which doesn't exist, which is a land of freedom and free ideas.
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What does an atheist scream when they come?
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I love talking about the Kennedy assassination. The reason I do is because I'm fascinated by it. I'm fascinated that our government could lie to us so blatantly, so obviously for so long, and we do absolutely nothing about it.
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What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?
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How about a positive LSD story? Wouldn't that be news-worthy, just the once? To base your decision on information rather than scare tactics and superstition and lies? I think it would be news-worthy.
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Pot is a better drug than alcohol. I'll prove it to you. You're at a ball game or a concert, and someone's really violent and agressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or are they smoking pot?
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not all drugs are good.. some of them are great
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We killed 6 innocent people, launching 22, I think $3 million apiece missiles on Baghdad...that's a little bit overdoing it.
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While I've found many of the religious shows I've viewed over the years not to be to my liking, or in line with my own beliefs, I've never considered it my place to exert any greater type of censorship than changing the channel, or better yet - turning off the TV completely.
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The puppet on the right shares my beliefs, the puppet on the left is more to my liking. Hey...there's one guy holding up both!
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Our next Cold War ought to be with ourselves...After all, who poses the biggest danger to the American environment? We do.
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No one knows what it's like ... to be a dustbin ... in Shaftesbury ... with hooligans.
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It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.
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....All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.
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I am available for children's parties, by the way.
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A lotta Christians wear crosses 'round their necks do you think if Jesus comes back he ever wants to see another cross?
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.
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Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.
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The waitress comes over to me like, 'What'chu readin' for?' I had never been asked that. Not 'What am I reading?' but 'What am I reading for?' Goddammit, you stumped me. Hmm, why do I read? I suppose I read for a lot of reasons, one of the main ones being so I don't end up being a... waffle waitress.
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