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I've had good times on drugs...bad times on drugs...But I've had good and bad relationships...and I'm not giving up pussy.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Times
Giving
Good
Pussy
Drugs
Relationships
Drug

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No one can give you any answers. There aren't any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
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They Want You To Be A Docile Apathetic Consumer
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All your beliefs, they're just that. They're nothing. They're how you were taught and raised. That doesn't make 'em real.
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Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas.
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Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! ... That's the story of Jesus.
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It's you people dying from nothing that are screwed. I got all sorts of neat gadgets waiting for me...oxygen tent, iron lung.
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Courtroom for Ted Bundy's trial is packed with women, trying to meet him and give him love letters and wedding-fucking-proposals...and the first thought that enters my mind is, And I'm not getting laid. What am I doing wrong?
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What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
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It's not a war on drugs, it's a war on personal freedom.
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I've said all that I've had to say.
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No one knows what it's like ... to be a dustbin ... in Shaftesbury ... with hooligans.
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Are gun rights advocates arguing that roving gangs...shooting innocent bystanders constitutes a 'well-regulated militia'?
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A lotta Christians wear crosses 'round their necks do you think if Jesus comes back he ever wants to see another cross?
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People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?'
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Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is.
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But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It's no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.
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To me pornography is...spending all your money and not educating the people in America, but spending it instead on weapons.
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I am available for children's parties, by the way.
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Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
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I find it ironic that people who are against things that cause sexual thoughts are generally fundamentalist Christians who also believe you should be fruitful and multiply.
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