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All day long you see those commercials: 'Here's Your Brain, Just Say No'...and the next commercial is: 'This Bud's For You.'

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Next
Long
Bud
Commercials
Commercial
Brain

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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Sometimes you feel in control, and it's great, but sometimes you just don't feel in control and you really have to struggle to get laughs.
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
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Okay, I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready?
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I'll tell you how to solve this abortion thing...Those unwanted babies...? Leave about 12 of them on the Supreme Court steps.
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I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious.
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A lotta Christians wear crosses 'round their necks do you think if Jesus comes back he ever wants to see another cross?
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I used to love to call L.A. when I lived in New York... Is that the Big One I hear in the background? Bye, you lizard scum! Bye!
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Don't worry don't be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride.
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I'm very tired of staring out into your vacant faces looking back at me. Wanting to fill your empty lives with humor you couldn't possibly think of yourself... Good evening!
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I don't care if you're obscene, filthy, horrendous -- as long as you're honest.
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What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn't it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It's gonna be worth it!.
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Billy Ray Cyrus does not smoke. Michael Bolton doesn't...Paula Abdul doesn't...there does seem to be a pattern.
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It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.
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Our next Cold War ought to be with ourselves...After all, who poses the biggest danger to the American environment? We do.
Bill Hicks
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People often ask me where I stand politically. It's not that I disagree with Bush's economic policy or his foreign policy, it's that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left.
Bill Hicks
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Go back to bed America, your government is in control again. Go back to bed America... you are free to do as we tell you... you are free to do as we tell you.
Bill Hicks
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The puppet on the right shares my beliefs, the puppet on the left is more to my liking. Hey...there's one guy holding up both!
Bill Hicks
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You're not a human till you're in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
Bill Hicks
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What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?
Bill Hicks
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Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is.
Bill Hicks