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We'll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God - I am killing me!

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Prankster
Pranksters
Believes
Killing
Believe

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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Why is pot against the law? It wouldn't be because anyone can grow it, and therefore you can't make a profit off it, would it?
Bill Hicks
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
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Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is.
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That's what I'm gonna do: quit gradually...I'm gonna lose one lung little while later I'm gonna lose the other one.
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I'm tired of this back-slappin' isn't humanity neat bullshit. We're a virus with shoes.
Bill Hicks
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If I thought the Jews killed God, I'd worship the Jews.
Bill Hicks
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Go back to bed America, your government is in control again. Go back to bed America... you are free to do as we tell you... you are free to do as we tell you.
Bill Hicks
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I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift.
Bill Hicks
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It's my object to be stared at like a dog that's just been shown a card trick.
Bill Hicks
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The Voice of Reason is in us all...and everyone can recognize it because it makes sense and everyone benefits from it equally.
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I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, 'My dad can beat up your dad.' I'd say 'Yeah? When?'
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What strikes me as funny about Elvis is that all the impersonators choose to do the Vegas Elvis not the young, cool guy, always the bloated fool.
Bill Hicks
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I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine! Let's go over those numbers again, they're a little baffling at first: Iraq: 150,000, USA: 79. Does that mean we could have won with only 80 guys there? Just one guy in a ticker-tape parade, I did it! Hey!
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I find it ironic that people who are against things that cause sexual thoughts are generally fundamentalist Christians who also believe you should be fruitful and multiply.
Bill Hicks
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I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind's sole purpose on this planet.
Bill Hicks
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I am available for children's parties, by the way.
Bill Hicks
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Are gun rights advocates arguing that roving gangs...shooting innocent bystanders constitutes a 'well-regulated militia'?
Bill Hicks
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
Bill Hicks
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I hate patriotism... I can't stand it. It's a round world last time I checked.
Bill Hicks