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You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That's like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
Bill Hicks
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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Going
Jackie
Really
Cross
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Jesus
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Rifles
More quotes by Bill Hicks
....All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.
Bill Hicks
How do I know the Bible isn't the word of God? Well if it was the word of God it would be clear and easy to understand...considering God was the creator of LANGUAGE!
Bill Hicks
How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again? ...Seventy percent. What the fuck? Where did they take this poll, at an S&M parlor?
Bill Hicks
I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.
Bill Hicks
I don't care if you're obscene, filthy, horrendous -- as long as you're honest.
Bill Hicks
I'm tired of this back-slappin' isn't humanity neat bullshit. We're a virus with shoes.
Bill Hicks
Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
Bill Hicks
All your beliefs, they're just that. They're nothing. They're how you were taught and raised. That doesn't make 'em real.
Bill Hicks
What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
Bill Hicks
What strikes me as funny about Elvis is that all the impersonators choose to do the Vegas Elvis not the young, cool guy, always the bloated fool.
Bill Hicks
The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It's a war against our civil rights, that's all it is. They're using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
Bill Hicks
Laughter makes the bitter swallowing of truth, for some, a little easier.
Bill Hicks
All governments are lying cocksuckers.
Bill Hicks
Surgeon General's warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.
Bill Hicks
I don't get along with anything, I really don't...I'm, I'm, maybe I'm just a, you know, incredibly tasteful human being.
Bill Hicks
Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one.
Bill Hicks
People often ask me where I stand politically. It's not that I disagree with Bush's economic policy or his foreign policy, it's that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left.
Bill Hicks
I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
Bill Hicks
It's not a war on drugs, it's a war on personal freedom.
Bill Hicks
Ultimately, it is in fun. It is supposed to be highly entertaining.
Bill Hicks
