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I'm tired of this back-slappin' isn't humanity neat bullshit. We're a virus with shoes.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Shoes
Tired
Humanity
Misanthropy
Back
Misanthrope
Virus
Viruses
Neat
Bullshit

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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I'm a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.
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All your beliefs, they're just that. They're nothing. They're how you were taught and raised. That doesn't make 'em real.
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It seems to me that there will be a point in out development or our evolution where you put your guns aside.
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I don't care if you're obscene, filthy, horrendous -- as long as you're honest.
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I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.
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....All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.
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How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again? ...Seventy percent. What the fuck? Where did they take this poll, at an S&M parlor?
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Ultimately, it is in fun. It is supposed to be highly entertaining.
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If you are living for tomorrow, you will always be one day behind.
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It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.
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I just have one of those faces. People come up to me and say, 'What's wrong?' Nothing. 'Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile.' Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me alone?
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I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself - to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.
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No one can give you any answers. There aren't any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
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We're supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
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What before seemed a...frustrating wall, the comic deftly and fearlessly steps through, proving the absurdity of it all.
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People say to me, Hey, Bill, the war made us feel better about ourselves. Really? What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves? May I suggest, instead of a war to feel better about yourself, perhaps... sit-ups? Maybe a fruit cup? Eight glasses of water a day?
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I love talking about the Kennedy assassination. The reason I do is because I'm fascinated by it. I'm fascinated that our government could lie to us so blatantly, so obviously for so long, and we do absolutely nothing about it.
Bill Hicks
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I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine! Let's go over those numbers again, they're a little baffling at first: Iraq: 150,000, USA: 79. Does that mean we could have won with only 80 guys there? Just one guy in a ticker-tape parade, I did it! Hey!
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I've had good times on drugs...bad times on drugs...But I've had good and bad relationships...and I'm not giving up pussy.
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