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When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Comedy
Issues
Sides
Funny
Two
Issue
Form
Agree
People
Humor
Side

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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It's you people dying from nothing that are screwed. I got all sorts of neat gadgets waiting for me...oxygen tent, iron lung.
Bill Hicks
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I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f-kin' mouth.
Bill Hicks
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I'm an American who loves an America which doesn't exist, which is a land of freedom and free ideas.
Bill Hicks
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Pornography is any act that has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts...Sounds like almost every commercial on TV to me.
Bill Hicks
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I was just down in Dallas, Texas...the Assassination Museum...it's really accurate, you know, 'cause Oswald's not in it.
Bill Hicks
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All governments are lying cocksuckers.
Bill Hicks
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Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can't find your fags.
Bill Hicks
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The CIA has a plot...they've used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem...is convincing Hussein...to fly to Dallas.
Bill Hicks
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Okay, I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready?
Bill Hicks
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While I've found many of the religious shows I've viewed over the years not to be to my liking, or in line with my own beliefs, I've never considered it my place to exert any greater type of censorship than changing the channel, or better yet - turning off the TV completely.
Bill Hicks
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let's put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
Bill Hicks
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
Bill Hicks
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....All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.
Bill Hicks
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People in the United Kingdom and outside the United States share my bemusement with the United States that America doesn't share with itself.
Bill Hicks
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No one knows what it's like ... to be a dustbin ... in Shaftesbury ... with hooligans.
Bill Hicks
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The waitress comes over to me like, 'What'chu readin' for?' I had never been asked that. Not 'What am I reading?' but 'What am I reading for?' Goddammit, you stumped me. Hmm, why do I read? I suppose I read for a lot of reasons, one of the main ones being so I don't end up being a... waffle waitress.
Bill Hicks
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Sixteen years I've pounded my head against the mentality of America, which...I'd say it's about an 8th grade emotional level.
Bill Hicks
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Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that's why you giggle the first hour.
Bill Hicks
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Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! ... That's the story of Jesus.
Bill Hicks
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You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That's like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
Bill Hicks