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Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both sexes I don't listen to.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Women
Sexes
Great
Agnostic
Priests
Atheist
Sex
Listen
Humor
Funny

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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You ever notice that everyone who believes in creationism looks really un-evolved?
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I, like all artists in Western cultures, am a shaman...come in the guise of a comic...to heal perception by using...'jokes'.
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So scary watching the news...Like Iraq...could ever under any stretch of the imagination be any threat to us whatsoever.
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I can't believe a war against drugs when they have anti-drug commercials on TV all day long followed by This Bud is for you.
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The CIA has a plot...they've used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem...is convincing Hussein...to fly to Dallas.
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...love rather than fear...this radical philosophy is coming from me, an avowed misanthrope...surely there is hope for us all.
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People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?'
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I'm a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.
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Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
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What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?
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I don't care if you're obscene, filthy, horrendous -- as long as you're honest.
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We killed 6 innocent people, launching 22, I think $3 million apiece missiles on Baghdad...that's a little bit overdoing it.
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....All drugs should be legal. War is wrong. The rich get richer. The poor get poorer. Thank you. I'll be here all week.
Bill Hicks
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When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
Bill Hicks
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Smoking may cause fetal injury or premature birth. ... I found my brand. Just don't get the ones that say, Lung Cancer.
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If ur going to have a war on drugs, have them against ALL drugs, including alcohol, the number one offender.
Bill Hicks
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And I'm not getting laid! What am I doing wrong?
Bill Hicks
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I don't do drugs anymore... than, say, the average touring funk band.
Bill Hicks
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Ultimately, it is in fun. It is supposed to be highly entertaining.
Bill Hicks
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What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn't it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It's gonna be worth it!.
Bill Hicks