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I'm going out... because I deserve to go out! And I'm going to get drunk... because I deserve to get drunk! And get out of my way!

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Drunk
Deserve
Going
Way

More quotes by Bill Cosby

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We are the only animals that let our kids come back home.
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A person with no children says, Well I just love children, and you say Why? and they say, Because a child is so truthful, that's what I love about 'em - they tell the truth. That's a lie, I've got five of 'em. The only time they tell the truth is if they're having pain.
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Nothing I've ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children.
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A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.
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Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought it home was when another comedian said to me, 'If you changed color tomorrow, you wouldn't have any material.' He meant it as a put-down, but I took it as a challenge.
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The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
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I was'nt always black. there was this freckel that just grew and grew.
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I can't even talk the way these people talk. 'Why you ain't?' 'Where you is?' Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth.
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I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid.
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The childless experts on child raising also bring tears of laughter to my eyes when they say, I love children because they're so honest. There is not an agent in the CIA or the KGB who knows how to conceal the theft of food, how to fake being asleep, or how to forge a parent's signature like a child.
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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
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My wife was a beautiful woman before we had children.
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People say God will find a way. God can't find a way if you're in the way.
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You'll have many, many friends, but if your relationship with your mate is one hundred per cent of your heart, you'll never need a friend.
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People will frighten you about a graduation.... They use words you don't hear often: And we wish you Godspeed. It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.
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But if that's what you want to be, that's what you will be - as long as you study.
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Any husband who says, My wife and I are completely equal partners, is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge.
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It's painful, but we can't heal ourselves unless we cleanse the wounds.
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You people are not prepared. You are well educated and you look cute, but that's not going to cut it.
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After creating the heaven, the earth, the ocean, and the entire animal kingdom, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was Don't.
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