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I'm going out... because I deserve to go out! And I'm going to get drunk... because I deserve to get drunk! And get out of my way!

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Drunk
Deserve
Going
Way

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I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!
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Fatherhood is helping your children learn English as a foreign language.
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I don't have a clue about the way to achievement, however the way to disappointment is attempting to please everyone.
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Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.
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The serve was invented so that the net could play.
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When the child is twelve, your wife buys her a splendidly silly article of clothing called a training bra. To train what? I never had a training jock. And believe me, when I played football, I could have used a training jock more than any twelve-year-old needs a training bra.
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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
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There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
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As a comedian, I can walk out in front of 5000 people and not worry about a thing. Not a thing, believe me. But to stand up a face a camera and crew of maybe 15 guys and get up tight about it - to me that's weird.
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I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
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Laughter brings out the child in all of us.
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Parenting needs to come to the forefront.
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These people marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an education and now we've got these knuckleheads walking round.
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My father established our relationship when I was seven years old. He looked at me and said, “You know, I brought you in this world, and I can take you out. And it don't make no difference to me, I'll make another one look just like you.
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Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook.
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I was a physical education major with a child psychology minor at Temple, which means if you ask me a question about a child's behavior, I will advise you to tell the child to take a lap.
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If you have a question about anything, the answer can be found in a book somewhere in the library.
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People will frighten you about a graduation.... They use words you don't hear often: And we wish you Godspeed. It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.
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