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I love it when mothers get so mad they can't remember your name. Come here, Roy, er, Rupert, er, Rutabaga... what is your name, boy? And don't lie to me, because you live here, and I'll find out who you are.

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Remember
Mad
Find
Humor
Live
Boys
Come
Name
Love
Names
Lying
Funny
Rupert
Mother
Mothers

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Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought it home was when another comedian said to me, 'If you changed color tomorrow, you wouldn't have any material.' He meant it as a put-down, but I took it as a challenge.
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When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing ... will win arguments and straighten people out.
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I wanted to give the house back to the parents.
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You also notice that the right side of your face feels like it's sliding off of your skull. And your bottom lip is in your lap!
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Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.
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A person with no children says, Well I just love children, and you say Why? and they say, Because a child is so truthful, that's what I love about 'em - they tell the truth. That's a lie, I've got five of 'em. The only time they tell the truth is if they're having pain.
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You know my father's favorite game? Come here and pull my finger.
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Man can not live by bread alone ... he must have peanut butter.
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