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I love it when mothers get so mad they can't remember your name. Come here, Roy, er, Rupert, er, Rutabaga... what is your name, boy? And don't lie to me, because you live here, and I'll find out who you are.
Bill Cosby
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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Funny
Rupert
Mother
Mothers
Remember
Mad
Find
Humor
Live
Boys
Come
Name
Love
Names
Lying
More quotes by Bill Cosby
The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
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The dentist drills some more and you hear him make a mistake. And to cover it up, they all say the same thing: Okay, rinse.
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Parents are people who yell and they yell and they yell and they yell. And you already have the point... and they're still yelling.
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All around the United States of America - in the cities and the counties - our public education is suffering and has been suffering. Cuts, cuts, cuts.
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My wife was a beautiful woman before we had children.
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There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
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I said to a guy, Tell me, what is it about cocaine that makes it so wonderful, and he said, Because it intensifies your personality. I said, Yes, but what if you're an asshole?
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My father wanted me to play pro football, and he didn't like the fact that I'd left school. And he said, It takes a man to play football. And any fool can go up on the stage and make an ass of himself.
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Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought it home was when another comedian said to me, 'If you changed color tomorrow, you wouldn't have any material.' He meant it as a put-down, but I took it as a challenge.
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Brown versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem.
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I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.
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People will frighten you about a graduation.... They use words you don't hear often: And we wish you Godspeed. It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.
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Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you.
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I feel that in-person contact with people is the most important thing in comedy. While I'm up on stage, I can actually put myself into the audience and adjust my pace and tuning to them. I can get into their heads through their ears and through their eyes. Only through this total communication can I really achieve what I'm trying to do.
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Family is conflict and it's something that we all relate to.
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But if that's what you want to be, that's what you will be - as long as you study.
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Fatherhood is helping your children learn English as a foreign language.
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I am not afraid of crashing, my secret is . . . just before we hit the ground, I jump as high as I can.
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Let me say this: I only expect the black media to uphold the standards of excellence in journalism and when you do that, you have to go in with a neutral mind.
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As a comedian, I can walk out in front of 5000 people and not worry about a thing. Not a thing, believe me. But to stand up a face a camera and crew of maybe 15 guys and get up tight about it - to me that's weird.
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