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My mother was an authority on pig sties. This is the worst looking pigsty I have ever seen in my life, and I want it cleaned up right now.

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Mother
Pigsty
Ever
Cleaned
Right
Pigs
Life
Son
Authority
Worst
Seen
Looking

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I don't have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing.
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Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook.
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When the child is twelve, your wife buys her a splendidly silly article of clothing called a training bra. To train what? I never had a training jock. And believe me, when I played football, I could have used a training jock more than any twelve-year-old needs a training bra.
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You can't be everything to everyone
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Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His kids.
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I was a physical education major with a child psychology minor at Temple, which means if you ask me a question about a child's behavior, I will advise you to tell the child to take a lap.
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Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.
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Grandparents are God's gifts to children.
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Zip zop wop boopity bop.
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People say God will find a way. God can't find a way if you're in the way.
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I did not want to turn to playing golf because golf is about as much exercise as shuffling cards.
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You'll have many, many friends, but if your relationship with your mate is one hundred per cent of your heart, you'll never need a friend.
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Well, I really don't know what the secret of success is but I can tell you that the secret of failure is to try to please everyone.
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I don't have a clue about the way to achievement, however the way to disappointment is attempting to please everyone.
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Why do kids always say peace out, I though peace was in.
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Romance is a different word than sexual contact.
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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
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I didn't know how serious it is to a female that you lift the lid.
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You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery.
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I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!
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