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My children love my mother, and I tell my children, that is not the same woman I grew up with...That is an old woman trying to get into heaven now.

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Heaven
Family
Woman
Tell
Mother
Children
Trying
Love
Grew

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I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
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The secret of success is to be like a duck, Smooth and unruffled on top, But paddling furiously underneath.
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I've got a Ferrari. VROOM! I do 104 from the garage to the front door.
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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
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Social networking helps reach people easier and quicker.
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Fatherhood is telling your daughter that Michael Jackson loves all his fans, but has special feelings for the ones who eat broccoli.
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The dentist drills some more and you hear him make a mistake. And to cover it up, they all say the same thing: Okay, rinse.
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Have you ever had a cookie? Then you won't get any here either.
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The game of chess. Supposedly men made it up, and it's about war and men and the ravages and the bravery and the genius of commanding and moving pieces and ... No. It's marriage. The Queen moves anywhere she wants.
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You people are not prepared. You are well educated and you look cute, but that's not going to cut it.
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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
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In your 50s, time becomes precious and must not be wasted. Every minute is an excellent opportunity for a good nap. Happy 50th birthday!
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A pelican that is wet walks with a gated limp, but a dry fish swims alone.
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Laughter brings out the child in all of us.
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Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.
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Most fathers and... Mothers. Only your grandmother and Ghengis Khan know how to do it.
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As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by 'survival of the fittest.'
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When the child is twelve, your wife buys her a splendidly silly article of clothing called a training bra. To train what? I never had a training jock. And believe me, when I played football, I could have used a training jock more than any twelve-year-old needs a training bra.
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In America ... the seven ages of man have become preschooler, Pepsi generation, baby boomer, mid-lifer, empty-nester, senior citizen, and organ donor.
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Parenting needs to come to the forefront.
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