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If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

Bill Cosby

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Bill Cosby
Age: 87
Born: 1937
Born: July 12
American Football Player
Comedian
Composer
Dub Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Manufacturer
Screenwriter
Singer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
William Henry Bill Cosby Jr.
Dr. William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William H. Cosby Jr. Ed.D.
William Henry Cosby Jr.
Chance
Parenthood
Take
Defeated
Right
Whatever
Fifty
Feels
American
Dad
Even
Fact
Comfort
Funny
Percent
Fathering
Father
Humor
Bewildered
Facts
Situation
Fatherhood
Doe

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I don't think you can bring the races together by joking about the differences between them. I'd rather talk about the similarities, about what's universal in their experiences.
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Why do I have to feed the kids? They just ate twelve hours ago!
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My dad came over to the house... went into his pocket and pulled out a handful of money, and began to pass it out to the children... This was the same man who, when I was his child, I would ask him for 50 cents, this man would tell me his life's story.
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I don't have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing.
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When we look at the settling of America we see a Bible in hand and God. Every Thanksgiving has God and the peacefulness of gratitude. It was important when the Twin Towers were hit and the sorrow with them that the first thing Congress did was sing God Bless America.
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Grandparents are God's gifts to children.
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Mediocre people are the most dangerous people in the world.
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I know people are tired of me not saying anything, but a guy doesn't have to answer to innuendos.
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If the audience knows you can be funny when you want to be, they will be willing to wait for that payoff.
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It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.
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Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook.
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The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.
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The first-born in every family is always dreaming for an imaginary older brother or sister who will look out for them.
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Fatherhood is helping your children learn English as a foreign language.
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There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.
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Social networking helps reach people easier and quicker.
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Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.
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When I decided that I wanted to go to college, I wanted to be a school teacher for 7th and 8th grade boys because I felt that was an important time for them. I had gone astray at that point in my life and really wanted to help keep them from making the same mistake I had made.
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The childless experts on child raising also bring tears of laughter to my eyes when they say, I love children because they're so honest. There is not an agent in the CIA or the KGB who knows how to conceal the theft of food, how to fake being asleep, or how to forge a parent's signature like a child.
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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.
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