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I used to think you had to live this miserable life and that that would make you funnier, but you don't. The misery will come. The misery will find you.
Bill Burr
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Bill Burr
Age: 56
Born: 1968
Born: June 10
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Canton
Massachusetts
William Frederic Bill Burr
Life
Used
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Live
Come
Make
Would
Funnier
Think
Miserable
Thinking
Misery
More quotes by Bill Burr
Let's go to Brunch. What a great idea! Why would you want to sleep in on a Sunday when you can go pay $18 for eggs? Now, you're thinking.
Bill Burr
I'm not easy to live with. My wife is a saint.
Bill Burr
People should be happy to see you when you show up to a club because you're a good person. And stop caring about what the industry is looking for. Just say what you think is funny. .
Bill Burr
I liked Jimmy Snuka, Tony Garea, Larry Zbyszko, Bob Backlund, Bruno Sammartino, Chief Strongbow, SD Jones (even though they never let him win), Captain Lou, Ted DiBiase...Uh...I'm forgetting some people...Greg Valentine. Chris Rock and Ric Flair are the best. Ric Flair is the king.
Bill Burr
I don't mind either one [crowd that is more willing to interact or crowd that's more ready to just watch]. Both of them are forms of listening to what I'm saying so I can't ask for any more than that.
Bill Burr
I'm always looking at new ways to tell a joke so that it doesn't get stale while working on new jokes every night or I would go absolutely crazy and would want to kill myself. I just want to go in there and talk about what's bugging me.
Bill Burr
I bet The Walking Dead gets really low ratings out in Montana, just because all they need to do is look out their f-king window, am I right?
Bill Burr
I think it gets uncomfortable when you try to act like you didn't just tell a joke that bombed.
Bill Burr
It's a whole new world as far as getting a show on the air. There's good things and bad things.
Bill Burr
You have no idea how long a year is until you’re stone sober.
Bill Burr
I was painfully shy when I was younger but at some point you've gotta grow up. I think the genius in the man-boy thing is you tap into a woman's motherly instincts.
Bill Burr
I cannot believe that [Donald Trump] is actually in the debates.
Bill Burr
When I watch 'Breaking Bad,' my stomach is in knots.
Bill Burr
Do you know how many times a week people ask me why I'm yelling?
Bill Burr
If you try to deliver a funny line in a funny way, it comes out as wacky and you ruin the scene.
Bill Burr
I wish they would teach it in schools: Give people the belief that they are going to do well. A lot of people are really talented and scared to follow their talent because you don't know where it's going.
Bill Burr
What would you rather be? 52 and look 52, or 52 and look like a 28-year-old lizard?
Bill Burr
I keep doing specials because I think there are a lot of people who make movies and TV who are fans of comedy - if they start to like you, they'll get a project going and call you in.
Bill Burr
I consider Ric Flair to be one of the great comedic minds. But I never got to see him growing up because that was back when they still had territories.
Bill Burr
I was certified to take x-rays, but you can't just show up and start cleaning people's teeth.
Bill Burr