Quote

I love my dog. I hate bankers. I have issues with women. In my head, I’m a great guy.

Bill Burr

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Bill Burr
Age: 56
Born: 1968
Born: June 10
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Canton
Massachusetts
William Frederic Bill Burr
Funny
Hate
Women
Great
Bankers
Love
Dog
Issues
Head
Guy

More quotes by Bill Burr

Image
I bet The Walking Dead gets really low ratings out in Montana, just because all they need to do is look out their f-king window, am I right?
Bill Burr
Image
I've had a great time on the road, I would say shooting guns with a silencer in Jacksonville, Fla.
Bill Burr
Image
You know why men make more money than women? Because, in the unlikely event that we're both on the Titanic and it starts to sink, for some reason, you get to leave with the kids and I have to stay - that's why I get the dollar more an hour.
Bill Burr
Image
It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to. I think in the old days with the studio system the performer was a bit of an afterthought. You can be a wildcard on the internet. But if you put something on the internet once it's out there it's out there for life.
Bill Burr
Image
I consider Ric Flair to be one of the great comedic minds. But I never got to see him growing up because that was back when they still had territories.
Bill Burr
Image
I was in NYC during 9/11 it happened on a Tuesday, I was on stage Thursday. It was a small crowd, but it took about 10 days and comedy clubs were packed.
Bill Burr
Image
You know what a cubicle basically says? It basically says, like, 'You know what? We don't think you're smart enough for an office, but we don't want you to look at anybody.
Bill Burr
Image
I have this weird sort of Gemini thing where I can really be empathetic and a loving person. But if you piss me off, I can be one of the meanest, most sadistic people.
Bill Burr
Image
There's a big thing right now with people using stand-up as a scapegoat. People think comedians have the power to change someone in an hour. If we had that ability, the art would not be legal. It would too dangerous.
Bill Burr
Image
Animated program was definitely a different process but it was fun though, it had elements of doing my podcast where we were all in a booth with microphones joking around and stuff. It was definitely a fun process.
Bill Burr
Image
I do enjoy them. I get to meet the next generation of comics and help them out. Big comics doing small shows was something that used to happen a lot more back in the day. I wish there was more of that.
Bill Burr
Image
Don't be a jerk to other comics and don't let the business beat you down, stay positive and if you work your ass off you're going to get somewhere.
Bill Burr
Image
Haven't you noticed that every time the government f-ks up McDonald's has a new sandwich?
Bill Burr
Image
I'm one of those guys where you know, I'm 23 years into this and I love the road more than ever and rather than whittling down my schedule to just play the major cities, I've actually expanded the amount of places that I go to because I want to see a bunch of stuff. You know, plan it as I can while I'm still young enough to travel.
Bill Burr
Image
If I can sell out clubs and theaters and play dirtbags in movies, and get blown up in a car or get the crap beat out of me in a movie, that's good for me I'm good.
Bill Burr
Image
I love doing radio, and I love doing stand-up, obviously.
Bill Burr
Image
I love doing radio, and I love doing stand-up, obviously. I'm good flying up to four hours, but anything past that, I want to kill myself.
Bill Burr
Image
Inter-racial sex is probably some of the best sex on the planet. You know what that is? Because with inter-racial sex there's like this whole added pressure to perform. 'Cause it's kinda like you're not just humping for yourself. You're humping for your race. You got to represent your people.
Bill Burr
Image
My dad was a dentist but I wasn't a hygienist. I assisted my dad.
Bill Burr
Image
I think it gets uncomfortable when you try to act like you didn't just tell a joke that bombed.
Bill Burr