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My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that - a stern enforcer.

Bernie Mac

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Bernie Mac
Age: 50 †
Born: 1957
Born: October 5
Died: 2008
Died: August 9
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Street Artist
Television Actor
Television Producer
Chicago
Illinois
Mitch
Stern
Detectives
Officers
Police
Brother
Family
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More quotes by Bernie Mac

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I became the storyteller of South Side Chicago. I used an old Kiwi liquid shoe polish as a microphone. I'd go around the house interviewing everybody, telling stupid jokes, doing voices. I mimicked Sidney Poitier, Sammy Davis Jr., people on 'Laugh-In,' Flip Wilson.
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I hate to compare anything, especially while I'm promoting. I feel that's another disrespect, but 'Ocean's 13' is the best movie I've ever done in my life. No question.
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I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.
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The Bernie Mac Show' is my life. It's the truth, and I'm not ashamed of a minute, an hour, or a second of my life.
Bernie Mac
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I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.
Bernie Mac
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I can act. I've been acting for a long time, but like anything else, don't nobody owe you nothing. You've go to pay your dues. You go from A to Z you don't go from M to Z.
Bernie Mac
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I'm not ashamed to tell the truth about what happened in my family. I think that's what makes my comedy different.
Bernie Mac
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I learned hard lessons in life I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father - who I had only recently met - died.
Bernie Mac
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Whatever you hear at the barber shop, stays at the barber shop.
Bernie Mac
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My humor had changed from foolishness to making sense.
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I don't need to pat myself on the back until my arm breaks. I don't need any of that.
Bernie Mac
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I'm not a politician, I'm a comedian. I know my limitations.
Bernie Mac
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I've been in training for stardom.
Bernie Mac
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The one thing about comedy, making it become a part of you, the audience loves it, because you become part of them.
Bernie Mac
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I'm not a star, I hate that word, and I'm an entertainer. Stars fall, you know, I'm an entertainer. I want to be known as an entertainer.
Bernie Mac
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As I got older, I got into all kinds of things in the streets - but for some reason, I never got caught up with the gangs growing up. Everybody dug me, man. I never had problems.
Bernie Mac
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When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth.
Bernie Mac
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Making people laugh is what I've been doing since I was like four or five years old. I still have a lust, I still have a passion. I don't care about how I look, I'm dedicated to the laughs.
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You have to meet all of the challenges, big and small. Because how you start is how you finish.
Bernie Mac
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I don't care about how I look I'm dedicated to the laughs. You know, I used to be a clown, so - my name was Smoothie the Clown. All the training I had, all my training is geared toward making people laugh, and I didn't care about being cool.
Bernie Mac