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When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars - that's heaven here on earth.

Bernie Mac

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Bernie Mac
Age: 50 †
Born: 1957
Born: October 5
Died: 2008
Died: August 9
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Street Artist
Television Actor
Television Producer
Chicago
Illinois
Heaven
Lobster
Earth
Cigar
Play
Ice
Take
Beer
Good
Boat
People
Golf
Lobsters
Cold
Grill
Chance
Cigars

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I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.
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I don't ever watch myself. By watching, you try to perfect yourself, become a robot.
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It was rough being dark. I got heat from my own people more than anyone else. I remember going to my mom and saying, 'Why am I so black?' And she said, 'Because I'm black. You just gotta always work harder than the average bear.'
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Only way you can you get upset is when you expecting something.
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I have so much respect for what's funny.
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They say if you don't have your health you ain't got nothing, but the truth is you ain't got nothing if you don't have no one to worry about your health.
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Bernie Mac just says what you think but are afraid to say.
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If you mess something up, remember who got you there. Don't be pointing fingers, even if finger-pointing is called for. Only one you got to blame is your own self.
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I hate to compare anything, especially while I'm promoting. I feel that's another disrespect, but 'Ocean's 13' is the best movie I've ever done in my life. No question.
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Making people laugh is what I've been doing since I was like four or five years old. I still have a lust, I still have a passion. I don't care about how I look, I'm dedicated to the laughs.
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I'm not a politician, I'm a comedian. I know my limitations.
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I want people to say at the end of my day, you know, like I used to say about Sidney Poitier and James Cagney and Joan Crawford and Red Skelton and those guys and Bill Cosby. They did quality and substance. You always remember them.
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Sometimes when you lose you win, son. Failure is just life's way of preparing you for success.
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Whatever success I've had, I always like to top it.
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I learned hard lessons in life I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father - who I had only recently met - died.
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I'm an entertainer and I really enjoy entertaining. I think if you're going to really be what you say you are, you have to really live it, work it, practice it, and think it.
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Whatever you hear at the barber shop, stays at the barber shop.
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I love who I am. I love what I've become.
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I'm very much disciplined because I'm more mature. When I was young I just wanted to live, I could jump, I could run, I was quick and I was relentless.
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I can act. I've been acting for a long time, but like anything else, don't nobody owe you nothing. You've go to pay your dues. You go from A to Z you don't go from M to Z.
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