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I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be the respected patriarch of an ordinary English family. Very boring, Emerson.

Barbara Mertz

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Barbara Mertz
Age: 85 †
Born: 1927
Born: September 29
Died: 2013
Died: August 8
Archaeologist
Author
Egyptologist
Novelist
Writer
Canton
Illinois
Elizabeth Peters
Barbara Michaels
Barbara Louise Mertz
English
Ordinary
Wonder
Family
Sometimes
Patriarch
Would
Emerson
Like
Respected
Boring

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Now, Mama, Papa, and sir, said Ramses, please withdraw to the farthest corner and crouch down with your backs turned. It is as I feared we will never break through by this method. The walls are eight feet thick. Fortunately I brought along a little nitroglycerin-- Oh, good Gad, shrieked Inspector Cuff.
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I would not be at all surprised to find that it was for gold that Cain committed the first murder. (It happened a very long time ago, and Holy Writ, though no doubt divinely inspired, is a trifle careless about details. God is not a historian).
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Giving other people advice is one of the most irritating and useless activities known to man.
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I would never have supposed that inexperienced girl was capable of such cold-blooded, calculating manipulation!
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The opportunity to lecture had restored my good humor.
Barbara Mertz
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If someone lies down and invites you to trample upon him, you are a remarkable individual if you decline the invitation.
Barbara Mertz
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love has a very dulling effect on the brain
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Most men are reasonably useful in a crisis. The difficulty lies in convincing them that the situation has reached a critical point
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Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.
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The only people who are not in awe of Emerson's powerful voice and well-nigh superhuman strength are the members of his own family. He is aware of this, and often complains about it so from time to time I like to put on a little show of being intimidated. 'Proceed, my dear,' I said apologetically.
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Getting an idea for a book is not the problem, but you need 300 ideas - an idea a page.
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I am so tired of ruggedly handsome heroes. I don't know too many ruggedly handsome people who are necessarily nice people. In fact, the beautiful people have a big handicap because they rely too much on their appearance and don't bother to become interesting.
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The approval of a cat cannot but flatter the recipient.
Barbara Mertz
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When one is striding bravely into the future one cannot watch one's footing.
Barbara Mertz
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Emerson,' I said, choosing my words with care, 'it is a sheer drop from the cleft down to the base of the cliff. If you are bent on breaking your arm or your leg or your neck or all three, find a place closer to home so we won't have to carry you such a distance.
Barbara Mertz
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Martyrdom is often the result of excessive gullibility.
Barbara Mertz
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Many persons lead lives of crushing boredom.
Barbara Mertz
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..he continues to cling to the forlorn hope that I will turn into one of those swooning females...and fling myself squeeling at him whenever anything happens. Like all men, he clings to his illusions.
Barbara Mertz
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Loving someone condemns you to a lifetime of fear. You become painfully conscious of how fragile people are - bundles of brittle bones and vulnerable flesh, breeding grounds for billions of deadly germs and horrible diseases.
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A fondness for martyrdom, especially of the verbal variety, is common to the young.
Barbara Mertz