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In the silence I heard Bastet, who had retreated under the bed, carrying on a mumbling, profane monologue. (If you ask how I knew it was profane, I presume you have never owned a cat.)

Barbara Mertz

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Barbara Mertz
Age: 85 †
Born: 1927
Born: September 29
Died: 2013
Died: August 8
Archaeologist
Author
Egyptologist
Novelist
Writer
Canton
Illinois
Elizabeth Peters
Barbara Michaels
Barbara Louise Mertz
Bed
Retreated
Silence
Monologue
Knew
Monologues
Heard
Presume
Asks
Profane
Never
Owned
Carrying
Cat
Mumbling

More quotes by Barbara Mertz

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Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.
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If you take a man by surprise, and behave with sufficient arrogance, he will generally do what you ask. -Emerson
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Martyrdom is often the result of excessive gullibility.
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The opportunity to lecture had restored my good humor.
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If someone lies down and invites you to trample upon him, you are a remarkable individual if you decline the invitation.
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Nothing looks as self-satisfied as a contented cat.
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Most men are reasonably useful in a crisis. The difficulty lies in convincing them that the situation has reached a critical point
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Humor is an excellent method of keeping a tight rein on unproductive displays of emotion.
Barbara Mertz
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..he continues to cling to the forlorn hope that I will turn into one of those swooning females...and fling myself squeeling at him whenever anything happens. Like all men, he clings to his illusions.
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Cats always pick the laps of the people who don't like them.
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Spring is always cruel, with its false promise of resurrection.
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I have learned that particularly clever ideas do not always stand up under close scrutiny.
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Emerson,' I said, choosing my words with care, 'it is a sheer drop from the cleft down to the base of the cliff. If you are bent on breaking your arm or your leg or your neck or all three, find a place closer to home so we won't have to carry you such a distance.
Barbara Mertz
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It's not unsporting to thrash a cowardly cad,' said Simmons. 'Everyone knows you don't fight like a gentleman.' 'That might be called an oxymoron,' Ramses said. 'Oh--sorry. Bad form to use long words. Look it up when you get home.' The poor devil didn't know how to fight, like a gentleman or otherwise.
Barbara Mertz
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I would not be at all surprised to find that it was for gold that Cain committed the first murder. (It happened a very long time ago, and Holy Writ, though no doubt divinely inspired, is a trifle careless about details. God is not a historian).
Barbara Mertz
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...Nefret said with a gusty sigh, 'Well, that's done it. We may as well join in, Ramses, family arguments are the favorite form of amusement here and this looks like being a loud one.
Barbara Mertz
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there is nothing like a garden to rest the soul.
Barbara Mertz
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A fondness for martyrdom, especially of the verbal variety, is common to the young.
Barbara Mertz
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The only people who are not in awe of Emerson's powerful voice and well-nigh superhuman strength are the members of his own family. He is aware of this, and often complains about it so from time to time I like to put on a little show of being intimidated. 'Proceed, my dear,' I said apologetically.
Barbara Mertz
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You are softening toward the young rascal because he is ill, and because he says he likes cats. It is an engaging quality, Emerson. That depends, said Emerson darkly, on how he likes them.
Barbara Mertz