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Modern life. Where are we running? Sometimes what we want is not always where we are... Are we alone? Is the real winter inside our hearts? We are all struggling for definition in a world that resists our increase.
Aziz Ansari
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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Heart
Increase
Always
Inside
Life
Struggle
Resists
World
Modern
Struggling
Alone
Definition
Running
Definitions
Sometimes
Winter
Real
Hearts
More quotes by Aziz Ansari
It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different variations of a joke until I land on one I think is really good.
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If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights.
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I prefer being totally sober myself.
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Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
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I strapped an MP3 player to one of those floor-cleaning robots. Call him DJ Roomba - little guy cruises around and plays music. What's hot, DJ Roomba!
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With stand-up, it's more interesting to hear about people's failures than their successes.
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You want what you can't have. And if someone's being shitty to you, just move on. If someone's being shitty to you, no matter how great they are, that's shitty, and you don't want be with someone who treats you shitty.
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Yeah, I've been a little down. Totally natural. I'm getting a divorce, but now I'm ready to pull myself up by some G-strings.
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You've got to be pretty confident that you're good. If I do a show and for whatever reason no one laughs, I'll be like, 'Wow, those people are weird'.
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You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z'.
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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
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I'm like an elephant, ok? If I walk into a room, it's like, OK, he's in there.
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Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.
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The four sweetest words in the English language — 'You wore me down.'
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Regardless of your ethnicity or anything, if you do great work, people will notice and you'll get hired.
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I always hate telling my jokes in print 'cause I always feel like it reads so not funny and people read it and they think, 'Oh, so that's what that guy does in his stand-up? That's terrible.'
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I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
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If someone writes something shitty and you actually address them, most of the time they're just like, Oh, I'm sorry. I'm a big fan. And they're really nice people. When you're on the Internet, it's people's first instinct to just go after people.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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