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If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it.

Aziz Ansari

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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Remotely
Interesting
Show
Jobs
Shows
Would

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Aren't you scared your kid's getting kidnapped...RIGHT NOW?
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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
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Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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Instead of yelling your opinion, or telling people to shut up, or engaging in this clickbait-internet culture, have a dialogue with someone and ask people questions and listen to what they have to say.
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Modern life. Where are we running? Sometimes what we want is not always where we are... Are we alone? Is the real winter inside our hearts? We are all struggling for definition in a world that resists our increase.
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I just didn’t want to be pigeonholed as an 'ethnic comic' or an 'Asian comic.' I just wanted to be on the same playing field as everyone else.
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In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.
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I'm like an elephant, ok? If I walk into a room, it's like, OK, he's in there.
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If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights.
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Most people would say 'the deets', but I say 'the tails'. Just another example of innovation.
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I strapped an MP3 player to one of those floor-cleaning robots. Call him DJ Roomba - little guy cruises around and plays music. What's hot, DJ Roomba!
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The four sweetest words in the English language — 'You wore me down.'
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Oh, what's this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I'm walking on red carpet.
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You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z'.
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Most of my teachers when I grew up were like older white women. So, I couldn't really channel them.
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Come cook food with me and do nothing.
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As I always have with stand-up or anything, you kind of draw on what you're going through in your life.
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If it's possible, I binge. There are other shows, like 'The Americans' and 'Game of Thrones,' I watch and have to wait a week.
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