Quote

This is one of my favorite pick up strategies: I'm constantly giving women my keys. So far, none of them have shown up. Matter of time. And I've been robbed twice.

Aziz Ansari

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
None
Shown
Women
Twice
Matter
Pick
Giving
Strategy
Time
Favorite
Picks
Constantly
Robbed
Keys
Strategies

More quotes by Aziz Ansari

Image
London seems to be a town with a lot of comedy fans and people that really enjoy stand-up.
Aziz Ansari
Image
You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z'.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
Aziz Ansari
Image
It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different variations of a joke until I land on one I think is really good.
Aziz Ansari
Image
If you believe that men and women have equal rights, if someone asks if you're feminist, you have to say yes because that is how words work.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I write characters that are based on elements of people I know and experiences I've really had.
Aziz Ansari
Image
Whats the worst that could happen?! The worst that could happen is he could cut off your legs and use them to make stilts that look like legs!
Aziz Ansari
Image
If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.
Aziz Ansari
Image
If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it.
Aziz Ansari
Image
The hardest part about rollerblading is telling your parents you're gay.
Aziz Ansari
Image
Modern life. Where are we running? Sometimes what we want is not always where we are... Are we alone? Is the real winter inside our hearts? We are all struggling for definition in a world that resists our increase.
Aziz Ansari
Image
Most people would say 'the deets', but I say 'the tails'. Just another example of innovation.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I just think it's sad that the main places in our culture that we designate to meet new people are bars and nightclubs.
Aziz Ansari
Image
My dad grew up basically in a hut in Taiwan without enough food to eat. And within one generation his son in America gets to do a comedy show about whatever he wants.
Aziz Ansari
Image
Regardless of your ethnicity or anything, if you do great work, people will notice and you'll get hired.
Aziz Ansari
Image
I'm kind of obsessed with food. I like to eat. When I tour, it's like, well, like a food tour as much as a comedy tour.
Aziz Ansari
Image
Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.
Aziz Ansari
Image
The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
Aziz Ansari