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Whats the worst that could happen?! The worst that could happen is he could cut off your legs and use them to make stilts that look like legs!
Aziz Ansari
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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
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Happens
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Stilts
Looks
Whats
Make
Legs
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Cutting
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Happen
More quotes by Aziz Ansari
I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
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You've got to be pretty confident that you're good. If I do a show and for whatever reason no one laughs, I'll be like, 'Wow, those people are weird'.
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I was 18 when I started. I was hanging out with some friends and they asked if I had tried stand-up before. I hadn't, but I thought: 'What the hell?' So I went to an open mic night, and I liked it.
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You can't say your favorite kind of cake is birthday cake, that's like saying your favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.
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I'm the kind of person, if I see something, like a funny video, I want to share it. With Twitter and Tumblr you can do that on a mass scale, and people get to know your personality.
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It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different variations of a joke until I land on one I think is really good.
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When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
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If you believe that men and women have equal rights, if someone asks if you're feminist, you have to say yes because that is how words work.
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It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way.
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Most people would say 'the deets', but I say 'the tails'. Just another example of innovation.
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The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
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If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights.
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I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.
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Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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I'm kind of obsessed with food. I like to eat. When I tour, it's like, well, like a food tour as much as a comedy tour.
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No one's trying to get with jugglers.
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If someone writes something shitty and you actually address them, most of the time they're just like, Oh, I'm sorry. I'm a big fan. And they're really nice people. When you're on the Internet, it's people's first instinct to just go after people.
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I guess after college, I just got really into food. I also think going on the road doing stand-up makes you more into food. Because when you travel like that, one of the things to do is find really good places to eat.
Aziz Ansari
