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Most of my teachers when I grew up were like older white women. So, I couldn't really channel them.

Aziz Ansari

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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Like
Teachers
Older
Couldn
Grew
Teacher
White
Women
Really
Channel

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You can't say your favorite kind of cake is birthday cake, that's like saying your favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.
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As I always have with stand-up or anything, you kind of draw on what you're going through in your life.
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Oh, what's this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I'm walking on red carpet.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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To be honest, I tend to romanticize the past, and though I appreciate all the conveniences of modern life, sometimes I yearn for simpler times.
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With stand-up, it's more interesting to hear about people's failures than their successes.
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I can't think of any bank robbery comedy where it's about two normal guys. It's kind of like Superbad meets Heat, which is a cool combo, and it's just fun doing a normal guy that's robbing a bank.
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I prefer being totally sober myself.
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I guess after college, I just got really into food. I also think going on the road doing stand-up makes you more into food. Because when you travel like that, one of the things to do is find really good places to eat.
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No one's trying to get with jugglers.
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The hardest part about rollerblading is telling your parents you're gay.
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The four sweetest words in the English language — 'You wore me down.'
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Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.
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Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.
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I'm the kind of person, if I see something, like a funny video, I want to share it. With Twitter and Tumblr you can do that on a mass scale, and people get to know your personality.
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I always hate telling my jokes in print 'cause I always feel like it reads so not funny and people read it and they think, 'Oh, so that's what that guy does in his stand-up? That's terrible.'
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Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
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Most people would say 'the deets', but I say 'the tails'. Just another example of innovation.
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Regardless of your ethnicity or anything, if you do great work, people will notice and you'll get hired.
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If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it.
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