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Oh, what's this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I'm walking on red carpet.

Aziz Ansari

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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Shoe
Carpet
Red
Everywhere
Shoes
Walking

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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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The four sweetest words in the English language — 'You wore me down.'
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I just didn’t want to be pigeonholed as an 'ethnic comic' or an 'Asian comic.' I just wanted to be on the same playing field as everyone else.
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I always hate telling my jokes in print 'cause I always feel like it reads so not funny and people read it and they think, 'Oh, so that's what that guy does in his stand-up? That's terrible.'
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Maybe that's why I don't like religion because the first introduction to it was, you don't get to do that thing you just discovered that you really enjoy.
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The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
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I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
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Let's have a moment of silence for all the chubby Asian dudes that are getting 'Gangnam style!' yelled at them by bros around the world.
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It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way.
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I prefer being totally sober myself.
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No one's trying to get with jugglers.
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It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different variations of a joke until I land on one I think is really good.
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Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
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I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.
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I've never done online dating.
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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
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I'm the kind of person, if I see something, like a funny video, I want to share it. With Twitter and Tumblr you can do that on a mass scale, and people get to know your personality.
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Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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I write characters that are based on elements of people I know and experiences I've really had.
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