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I've never done online dating.

Aziz Ansari

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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Dating
Online
Done
Never

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You can't say your favorite kind of cake is birthday cake, that's like saying your favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.
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Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.
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This is one of my favorite pick up strategies: I'm constantly giving women my keys. So far, none of them have shown up. Matter of time. And I've been robbed twice.
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I just think it's sad that the main places in our culture that we designate to meet new people are bars and nightclubs.
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I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.
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If someone writes something shitty and you actually address them, most of the time they're just like, Oh, I'm sorry. I'm a big fan. And they're really nice people. When you're on the Internet, it's people's first instinct to just go after people.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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London seems to be a town with a lot of comedy fans and people that really enjoy stand-up.
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If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights.
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Yeah, I've been a little down. Totally natural. I'm getting a divorce, but now I'm ready to pull myself up by some G-strings.
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The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
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When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
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I'm like an elephant, ok? If I walk into a room, it's like, OK, he's in there.
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Any jokes I make I try to make sure it's on story and helps the characters and makes sense with the movie.
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I always hate telling my jokes in print 'cause I always feel like it reads so not funny and people read it and they think, 'Oh, so that's what that guy does in his stand-up? That's terrible.'
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Most single people I know, myself included, have a difficult time even meeting up with the people they like, be it busy schedules, texting games, or whatever.
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I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.
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