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I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.

Aziz Ansari

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TAGS & TOPICS

Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Places
Fun
Dishwasher
Dishwashers
Japanese
Cook
Cooks
Table
Tables

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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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I strapped an MP3 player to one of those floor-cleaning robots. Call him DJ Roomba - little guy cruises around and plays music. What's hot, DJ Roomba!
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Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
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It can take a few months to get a new 10 minutes. Usually it takes like 10 times of repeatedly trying different variations of a joke until I land on one I think is really good.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
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In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.
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I just didn’t want to be pigeonholed as an 'ethnic comic' or an 'Asian comic.' I just wanted to be on the same playing field as everyone else.
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Come cook food with me and do nothing.
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A lot of people my age think stand up sucks.
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Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.
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I've never done online dating.
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It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way.
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I guess after college, I just got really into food. I also think going on the road doing stand-up makes you more into food. Because when you travel like that, one of the things to do is find really good places to eat.
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Oh, what's this in my shoe? Red carpet insole. Everywhere I go, I'm walking on red carpet.
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I'm like an elephant, ok? If I walk into a room, it's like, OK, he's in there.
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The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
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To be honest, I tend to romanticize the past, and though I appreciate all the conveniences of modern life, sometimes I yearn for simpler times.
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Most of my teachers when I grew up were like older white women. So, I couldn't really channel them.
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