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A lot of people my age think stand up sucks.
Aziz Ansari
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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Sucks
Stand
Age
Think
Thinking
People
More quotes by Aziz Ansari
Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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If your job was remotely interesting, there would be a show on A&E about it.
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You want what you can't have. And if someone's being shitty to you, just move on. If someone's being shitty to you, no matter how great they are, that's shitty, and you don't want be with someone who treats you shitty.
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You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z'.
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Most of my teachers when I grew up were like older white women. So, I couldn't really channel them.
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I always hate telling my jokes in print 'cause I always feel like it reads so not funny and people read it and they think, 'Oh, so that's what that guy does in his stand-up? That's terrible.'
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My dad grew up basically in a hut in Taiwan without enough food to eat. And within one generation his son in America gets to do a comedy show about whatever he wants.
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One of my life goals is to be a best man. It's a baller position. You get drunk, you make speeches, and you make love to the prettiest bridesmaid, usually standing from behind.
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I write characters that are based on elements of people I know and experiences I've really had.
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I prefer being totally sober myself.
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In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.
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Yeah, I've been a little down. Totally natural. I'm getting a divorce, but now I'm ready to pull myself up by some G-strings.
Aziz Ansari
It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way.
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I've never done online dating.
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London seems to be a town with a lot of comedy fans and people that really enjoy stand-up.
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I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.
Aziz Ansari
Everyone's first thought is These women are going to take advantage of you or Someone's only going to date you because you're famous. That stuff's not really an issue because that's super-easy to see through.
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Most single people I know, myself included, have a difficult time even meeting up with the people they like, be it busy schedules, texting games, or whatever.
Aziz Ansari
I just think it's sad that the main places in our culture that we designate to meet new people are bars and nightclubs.
Aziz Ansari
Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.
Aziz Ansari