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A lot of people my age think stand up sucks.

Aziz Ansari

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Aziz Ansari
Age: 41
Born: 1983
Born: February 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Columbia
South Carolina
Aziz Ishmael Ansari
Aziz Ismail Ansari
Age
Think
Thinking
People
Sucks
Stand

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If someone writes something shitty and you actually address them, most of the time they're just like, Oh, I'm sorry. I'm a big fan. And they're really nice people. When you're on the Internet, it's people's first instinct to just go after people.
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When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
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Most single people I know, myself included, have a difficult time even meeting up with the people they like, be it busy schedules, texting games, or whatever.
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Modern life. Where are we running? Sometimes what we want is not always where we are... Are we alone? Is the real winter inside our hearts? We are all struggling for definition in a world that resists our increase.
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The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff.
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Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
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If it's possible, I binge. There are other shows, like 'The Americans' and 'Game of Thrones,' I watch and have to wait a week.
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Most of my teachers when I grew up were like older white women. So, I couldn't really channel them.
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With stand-up, it's more interesting to hear about people's failures than their successes.
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My dad grew up basically in a hut in Taiwan without enough food to eat. And within one generation his son in America gets to do a comedy show about whatever he wants.
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I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.
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What if I couldn't read? I wouldn't be able to text my friends movie times or even order cheese biscuits from Red Lobster!
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I can't think of any bank robbery comedy where it's about two normal guys. It's kind of like Superbad meets Heat, which is a cool combo, and it's just fun doing a normal guy that's robbing a bank.
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You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z'.
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The four sweetest words in the English language — 'You wore me down.'
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Others fear what the morrow may bring. I am afraid of what happened yesterday.
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I guess after college, I just got really into food. I also think going on the road doing stand-up makes you more into food. Because when you travel like that, one of the things to do is find really good places to eat.
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In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.
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As I always have with stand-up or anything, you kind of draw on what you're going through in your life.
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Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.
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