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Miracles do happen. You must believe this. No matter what else you believe about life, you must believe in miracles.

Augusten Burroughs

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Augusten Burroughs
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: October 23
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Miracle
Happen
Else
Happens
Matter
Must
Believe
Life
Miracles

More quotes by Augusten Burroughs

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Although I was able to maintain a pleasant expression, I was mentally throwing up in her face.
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I once read about a guy who lost his arms in a fire. The nurse took pity on him and gave him a hand job. I don't even get that.
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I did not consider him to be any kind of a genius. I considered him deeply lacking in the area that mattered most in life. Star quality.
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I'm always prepared for the worst.
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I really look at my childhood as being one giant rusty tuna can that I continue to recycle in many different shapes.
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Our lives are one endless stretch of misery punctuated by processed fast foods and the occasional crisis or amusing curiosity.
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If I were a serial killer, I would not be the kind that stabs and then eats the victim. I would be the kind that hides in a tree and shoots at the aerobics class.
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What police officer would dare ticket Death's minivan?
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I think people might think, oh, I don't want to approach the big famous author because it's embarrassing, but then they think for two seconds about it and realize, this is, like, a toilet bowl reader.
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I love you, she said, and I knew she meant it because she spoke the words from the heart at the center of her chest. This, at least, had not been left behind at the hospital.
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There's never a false note in a Berg novel.
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Even when we lose an arm or a leg, there's not less of us but more. Human experience weighs more than human tissue.
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And in my mind, this settles the issue. I would never drink cologne, and am therefore not an alcoholic.
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I always tried to learn Greek, but all I got out of it was, poulaki mou. [My little chicken.]
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You need to grab your dream out of the sky like it's a kite and pinch the string through your fingers until you reach the spool.
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Some damage is too severe, some harm endures. And what you have to do is accept it. And by accept it I mean, don’t be the paralyzed person in the bed who is waiting to walk again. Realize, it’s never gonna happen. And find some other way to get around –swing from a vine, get a Mad Max wheelchair. Anything but…wait.
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It's weird - sort of not terribly wise - to take a book that was successful and then change its cover.
Augusten Burroughs
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We haven't slept together. But we've napped
Augusten Burroughs
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My brother was born without taste or the desire to be professionally lit.
Augusten Burroughs
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You would be amazed by what you can give up, lose, or break, and yet still be a person who gets happy over brownies.
Augusten Burroughs