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I was learning that if I lived slightly in the future-what will happen next-I didn't have to feel so much about what was going on in the present.

Augusten Burroughs

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Augusten Burroughs
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: October 23
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Didn
Happens
Slightly
Feel
Lived
Feels
Present
Going
Learning
Much
Happen
Future
Next

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Saying just the right thing after a considerable, awkward pause is far less effective than saying the wrong thing with perfect timing. I'm telling you.
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Like cubic zirconia, I only look real. I'm an imposter. The fact is, I am not like other people.
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Writing has enriched my life in ways I never imaged.
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Maybe you feel pressure to be positive because so many people rely on your good, fake-positive energy? If that's the case, screw everybody else. You're not a bottle of Valium.
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It's weird - sort of not terribly wise - to take a book that was successful and then change its cover.
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He continues to smile expectantly. I take a step back. I don't want to catch whatever he has. He is a disturbing out-of-uniform Santa.
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I felt a bottomless sadness. So completely alone. Like one of my stuffed animals at home that I was too old for now, that sat on the shelf in my closet, mashed against the back wall.
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Other people sound flat to my ear their words just hang in the air. But when my mother says something, the ends curl.
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Bad news should be followed with soup. Then a nap.
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He's a really nice guy, if only I weren't me.
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The problem with not having anybody to tell you what to do, I understood, is that there was nobody to tell you what not to do.
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My only ritual is to just sit down and write, write every day.
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Although I was able to maintain a pleasant expression, I was mentally throwing up in her face.
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Throwing things horrified me. I suffered extreme, paralyzing anxiety when it came to anything remotely athletic. I wouldn't even run to catch the school bus because I knew I'd trip and then get teased for a year.
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I never listen to music when I write.
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I'm always prepared for the worst.
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Tracy, the leader of the CDH group, looks at me with eyes that seem to belong to someone three times her age. It's something beyond wisdom, all the way to insanity and back. It's like her eyes are scarred from all the things she's seen.
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Red hair is great. It's rare, and therefore superior.
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If you hate your life, you haven't' seen enough of it. If you hate your life, it's because your life is too small and doesn't' fit you.
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I've overcome a lot - sexual abuse, death of a loved one, bad parents and experienced life. My nature is such I not only survived all this but I have thrived. I've always been psychologically ambitious in that I've never been willing to settle emotionally for anything less then what's needed. I've wanted more then that from life.
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