Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
He continues to smile expectantly. I take a step back. I don't want to catch whatever he has. He is a disturbing out-of-uniform Santa.
Augusten Burroughs
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Augusten Burroughs
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: October 23
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Whatever
Uniforms
Back
Santa
Take
Disturbing
Continues
Catch
Smile
Step
Expectantly
Steps
Uniform
More quotes by Augusten Burroughs
I was struck with a bolt of distilled horror like I have never known before. Far worse than suddenly finding yourself walking through a prison cafeteria wearing Daisy Duke shorts and a Jane Fonda headband.
Augusten Burroughs
I don't have a fixed routine. I write every day but I don't write every day, if that makes any sense. In other words, I email with my friends constantly and sometimes I'll pull out something I've written and save it.
Augusten Burroughs
To me, these people were as exotic as animals in a zoo. I'd never seen anything like them. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to be one of them or simply live among them taking notes and photographs.
Augusten Burroughs
After was better. Before was only there so After could happen.
Augusten Burroughs
I felt a bottomless sadness. So completely alone. Like one of my stuffed animals at home that I was too old for now, that sat on the shelf in my closet, mashed against the back wall.
Augusten Burroughs
I knew that if I wrote a new book every six months or every year, if I continued to read great books, eventually I would write something worthy of publication. I understood I might be in my forties or my fifties or even my sixties, but I felt confident that it would happen.
Augusten Burroughs
Red hair is great. It's rare, and therefore superior.
Augusten Burroughs
He's a really nice guy, if only I weren't me.
Augusten Burroughs
When I first thought of being a writer I had visions of stacks of books in stores with my name on them, that sort of thing. But I never imagined this would be the reaction.
Augusten Burroughs
It's weird - sort of not terribly wise - to take a book that was successful and then change its cover.
Augusten Burroughs
I really look at my childhood as being one giant rusty tuna can that I continue to recycle in many different shapes.
Augusten Burroughs
My thoughts seem thick, ketchup stuck in a bottle. Like trying to feel someone's face while wearing goosedown mittens.
Augusten Burroughs
You cannot be a prisoner of your past against your will. Because you can only live in the past inside your mind.
Augusten Burroughs
Never work with children, puppies or bulimics.
Augusten Burroughs
The truth about not having everything you need, not being fully equipped or qualified or allowed is that these limits are the nebula of creative genius. When you have total freedom i.e: no limits at all. You stop trying to make the best of things
Augusten Burroughs
Our lives are one endless stretch of misery punctuated by processed fast foods and the occasional crisis or amusing curiosity.
Augusten Burroughs
I've just finished my next collection, Possible Side Effects, and I'm now working on a collection of holiday stories as well as a memoir about my relationship with my father.
Augusten Burroughs
If I were a serial killer, I would not be the kind that stabs and then eats the victim. I would be the kind that hides in a tree and shoots at the aerobics class.
Augusten Burroughs
My brother was born without taste or the desire to be professionally lit.
Augusten Burroughs
I'm always prepared for the worst.
Augusten Burroughs
