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We are often insane with happiness. We are also very unhappy for reasons neither of us can do anything about. Like being separated.
Audrey Niffenegger
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Audrey Niffenegger
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: June 13
Artist
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Science Fiction Writer
University Teacher
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South Haven
Michigan
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Separated
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The engagement ring is an emerald, and the dim light from the window is refracted green and white in it. The rings are silver, and they need cleaning. They need wearing, and I know just the girl to wear them.
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But you make me happy. It's living up to being happy that's the difficult part.
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Time passes and the pain begins to roll in and out as though it’s a woman standing at an ironing board, passing the iron back and forth, back and forth across a white tablecloth.
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When it's over you look up: the world looks the same but you are somehow different and that feeling lingers for days.
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He said something interesting: he said that he thinks there is only free will when you are in time, in the present. He says in the past we can only do what we did, and we can only be there if we were there.
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Our love has been the thread through the labyrinth, the net under the high-wire walker, the only real thing in this strange life of mine that I could ever trust.
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…she smiles in an exhausted but warm sort of way, as though she is a brilliant sun in some other galaxy
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Everything seems simple until you think about it.
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I love. I have loved. I will love.
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I wish for a moment that time would lift me out of this day, and into some more benign one. But then I feel guilty for wanting to avoid the sadness dead people need us to remember them, even if it eats us, even if all we can do is say I'm sorry until it is as meaningless air.
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Every minute of his life since then has been marked by her absence, every action has lacked dimension because she is not there to measure against. And when I was young I didn't understand, but now, I know, how absence can be present, like a damaged nerve, like a dark bird.
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That's what alcoholics do. It's in their job description: fall apart and then keep falling apart.
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We laugh and laugh, and nothing can ever be sad, no one can be lost, or dead, or far away: right now we are here, and nothing can mar our perfection, or steal the joy of this perfect moment.
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What we need,' Henry says, 'is a fresh start. A blank slate. Let's call her Tabula Rasa.
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I've noticed that Henry needs an incredible amount of physical activity all the time in order to be happy. It's like hanging out with a greyhound.
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