Quote

You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Girls
Screwed
Front
Agreed
Went
Censorship
Waiting
Fathers
Girl
Curse
Father
Naked
Two
Wait
Make
Fronts

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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
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Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
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A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
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Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
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Frank Sebastiano is a real write. He has two Emmys, one from 'SNL' and the other from 'The Chris Rock Show' . The only award I have is an FM-mmy.
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
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Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
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Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
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My dad was Superman to me, and in my mind he always will be.
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
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Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
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I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
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It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
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Historically, a successful life in comedy is a dream that's as equally pondered and unpursued as being an astronaut.
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