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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Ems
Drugs
Cool
Drug
Hate

More quotes by Artie Lange

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When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
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I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
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Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
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I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
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It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world
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It's good to be alive.
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At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
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It's not a drug problem, until you run out of money. Until then it's just drugs.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
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