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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
Artie Lange
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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Everything
Career
Good
Careers
Life
Pretty
People
Story
Interesting
Tell
Stories
Downside
Live
Helped
More quotes by Artie Lange
Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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I once dealt with a prima donna on a movie set. I won't say who, but his first name is a country. A communist country. Run by Fidel Castro.
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
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When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
Artie Lange
My dad was Superman to me, and in my mind he always will be.
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A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
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Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
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I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.
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You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
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At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?
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Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
Artie Lange