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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Kids
Reason
Heroin
Recommend
Wear
Effects

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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
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I want to see Toby Maguire fight Christian Bale.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
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Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
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It's good to be alive.
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I ain't apologizing for anything, especially if it's a joke.
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I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
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The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
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Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
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A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
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Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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Whiskey will always be a part of my life.
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