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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
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Yankee
Year
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Games
Quit
Without
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Ten
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
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If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?
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It's good to be alive.
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Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
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I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.
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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
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It's not a drug problem, until you run out of money. Until then it's just drugs.
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I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
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When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
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Frank Sebastiano is a real write. He has two Emmys, one from 'SNL' and the other from 'The Chris Rock Show' . The only award I have is an FM-mmy.
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Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that
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A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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I want to see Toby Maguire fight Christian Bale.
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