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At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
Artie Lange
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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Playing
Lines
Mirage
Kids
Mirages
Backyard
Backyards
Minnesota
Gambling
Line
More quotes by Artie Lange
I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
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It's good to be alive.
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I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
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I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
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Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
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I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
Artie Lange
Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
Artie Lange
Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
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Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
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Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
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'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
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It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
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If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
Artie Lange
The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
Artie Lange