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Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that
Artie Lange
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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Business
Shows
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Two
Politically
Anything
Correct
Play
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More quotes by Artie Lange
I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
Artie Lange
Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
Artie Lange
I ain't apologizing for anything, especially if it's a joke.
Artie Lange
Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
Artie Lange
When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
Artie Lange
I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say.
Artie Lange
Whiskey will always be a part of my life.
Artie Lange
Frank Sebastiano is a real write. He has two Emmys, one from 'SNL' and the other from 'The Chris Rock Show' . The only award I have is an FM-mmy.
Artie Lange
I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
Artie Lange
It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world
Artie Lange
I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.
Artie Lange
A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
Artie Lange
The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
Artie Lange
Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
Artie Lange
If you are a black woman, you get two history months in a row.
Artie Lange
Historically, a successful life in comedy is a dream that's as equally pondered and unpursued as being an astronaut.
Artie Lange
It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
Artie Lange
'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
Artie Lange
You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
Artie Lange
The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
Artie Lange