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It's good to be alive.

Artie Lange

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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Alive
Good

More quotes by Artie Lange

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I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
Artie Lange
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Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
Artie Lange
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My dad was Superman to me, and in my mind he always will be.
Artie Lange
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I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
Artie Lange
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I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
Artie Lange
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Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that
Artie Lange
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Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38.
Artie Lange
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The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
Artie Lange
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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
Artie Lange
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Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
Artie Lange
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I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
Artie Lange
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I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
Artie Lange
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All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
Artie Lange
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But I live an interesting life and I can tell a pretty good story and it has helped my career. But the downside is people know everything.
Artie Lange
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The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.
Artie Lange
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Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
Artie Lange
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When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
Artie Lange
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I ain't apologizing for anything, especially if it's a joke.
Artie Lange
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
Artie Lange
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When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
Artie Lange