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I once dealt with a prima donna on a movie set. I won't say who, but his first name is a country. A communist country. Run by Fidel Castro.
Artie Lange
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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Movie
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Prima
Running
Donna
Firsts
Fidel
First
Castro
Country
Dealt
Communist
Name
More quotes by Artie Lange
The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
Artie Lange
At the Mirage Sportsbook, you can get a line on 2 kid playing wiffleball in the backyard in Minnesota
Artie Lange
When you're on the road a lot, you're in perpetual search of a good night's sleep.
Artie Lange
I'm the type of guy where one thing leads to another and eventually it gets awful. If I put a $5 bet on a roulette table tonight at 10 o'clock, by tomorrow at noon I would be running guns to Cuba.
Artie Lange
Whiskey will always be a part of my life.
Artie Lange
It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.
Artie Lange
I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
Artie Lange
When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.
Artie Lange
Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.
Artie Lange
I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
Artie Lange
Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
Artie Lange
I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
Artie Lange
It's good to be alive.
Artie Lange
'Course the world of sports takes itself way too serious. Sports writers are all high and mighty.
Artie Lange
The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
Artie Lange
Historically, a successful life in comedy is a dream that's as equally pondered and unpursued as being an astronaut.
Artie Lange
A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.
Artie Lange
My dad was Superman to me, and in my mind he always will be.
Artie Lange
Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
Artie Lange
I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say.
Artie Lange