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I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of stability in my life.
Artie Lange
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Artie Lange
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: October 11
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Livingston
New Jersey
Arthur Steven Lange
Jr.
Arthur Lange
Jr.
Artie Steven Lange
Jr.
Artie Lange
Jr.
Live
Life
Easiest
Stability
Lack
Probably
Guy
More quotes by Artie Lange
Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.
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Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.
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It's good to be alive.
Artie Lange
Don't do drugs to be cool, do 'em because you hate yourself.
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I quit drinking, and I figure if I go to ten Yankee games this year without drinking I'll save $32,000.
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It's not a drug problem, until you run out of money. Until then it's just drugs.
Artie Lange
All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.
Artie Lange
You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don't curse.
Artie Lange
I snorted heroin once by accident. It was amazing. But kids, don't snort heroin. It's too good.
Artie Lange
I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.
Artie Lange
Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.
Artie Lange
Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.
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It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world
Artie Lange
I wish I was this dark genius artist - like Richard Pryor or something.
Artie Lange
Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.
Artie Lange
The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
Artie Lange
I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy angel dust
Artie Lange
I was always a thin kid I was an athlete.
Artie Lange
Whiskey will always be a part of my life.
Artie Lange
The only reason I can't recommend heroin to kids is because the effects wear off.
Artie Lange